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Pillowgate: Satan Wants You to Be Gay and Masturbate, According to this Creepy Jehovah’s Witness Video

In the mainstream world, many people try to paint the kind of imagery and music that we cover on CVLT Nation as evil or perverse. But in my reality, the video you are about to see about the official Jehovah’s Witnesses’ views on homosexuality and masturbation is creepy as fuck. It freaks me out that so many people worldwide share these fucked up views, and don’t want to think for themselves. I have mad respect for Lloyd Evans and the way he rips holes in all of the fucked up thoughts coming from the JW.

The door-knocking Christian sect known as the Jehovah’s Witnesses would like to talk to you about masturbation (namely, how to avoid it), and they’ve sent creepy “Governing Body helpers” Ralph Walls and Gary Breaux to talk to you about it in a slow, measured and homophobic way. This Jehovah’s Witness masturbation video is both hilarious and sadly real.

Lloyd Evans — a former Jehovah’s Witness turned documentary filmmaker and activist who is currently working on a project about the sect’s “indoctrination” — has edited a short satirical version of two videos currently being used by the religious sect to warn its believers about the dangers of masturbation (or, as Walls calls it, “the unclean habit of self-abuse”).


In the videos, Walls encourages women to avoid clothing which may sexually excite men. Breaux warns men about the same thing, adding that “Some outfits are designed to feminize a man’s appearance, as homosexuals try to do, especially displaying the buttocks and genitals.” Breaux also warns men against sleeping with a pillow or blanket between their legs, lest they become sexually aroused.


In response, Evans and other former Jehovah’s Witnesses are referring to the anti-masturbation videos as Pillowgate.

Lloyd Evans via Hornet

Breaux adds, “It’s no exaggeration to say that [Satan] has flooded his world with propaganda in favor of homosexuality” and goes on to talk about men sitting on each other’s laps or masturbating in front of each other.

Evans says that the videos were created for believers who live in church-owned worldwide properties known as as “bethel.” People who live in bethel are the most adherent to the faith, leading Evans to write, “Imagine what must have been happening at bethel to make this video necessary.”

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